Why I started thinking about success differently
Last year I found myself sitting in a cramped coffee shop in Bengaluru, scrolling through endless success quotes on Instagram. Most of them talked about "climbing the corporate ladder" or "building a brand" and I felt a strange disconnect. It was then a friend mentioned a panel discussion featuring Priyanka Sugandh, Jasmine Khurana and Mariyam Khatri. I thought, “Maybe hearing real stories will help me figure out what success truly means for me.” So I listened, took notes, and ended up walking away with three very different, yet oddly similar, maps of ambition.
From survival to self‑definition – Priyanka Sugandh’s journey
Priyanka Sugandh, Creative Expert at Enrich Salon, walked onto the stage with a calm confidence that instantly reminded me of my aunt who runs a tiny grocery store in a busy Delhi lane. Priyanka talked about entering a field she felt was dominated by men while raising two kids alone. "When I started working at Enrich, I felt this was a man’s world," she said, and I could see the echo of my own family’s expectations in her voice.
Back then, success for Priyanka was simple – a roof of her own. She confessed that the idea of owning a house was more about survival than ambition. "My definition of success back then was to own a house," she said, eyes flickering to a photo of a modest flat she had bought years ago. Fast forward to today, and that same house is now a symbol of resilience, independence and self‑worth. "Now I am proud to own a home I can truly call mine," she said, and I could feel the shift from just surviving to truly defining herself.
What struck me the most was how Priyanka described the everyday juggling act. She said, "A woman is expected to manage work, home, children, and social expectations—and do it all with a smile." It sounded like a familiar mantra I hear from my own mother, but Priyanka added that balance was not a universal rule – it was deeply personal. She emphasized that for her, balance meant accepting that some days you are a mother first, other days you are a salon manager, and on a rare occasion you just need a cup of chai and a moment to breathe.
When I asked Priyanka about confidence, she laughed and said people often called her "too bold". Her solution? Stay grounded, let the work speak, and over time, scepticism turned into belief. It reminded me of the time I was praised for a small project at work – the credit came slowly, but once it did, it felt like a real validation.
Finding purpose over applause – Jasmine Khurana’s perspective
Jasmine Khurana, poet and storyteller, entered the room with a notebook full of scribbles and a warm smile that instantly made people feel at ease. Her idea of success was nothing like the glossy magazine covers I see on the news – it was quieter, more internal. "For me, success has never been about money, name or accolades, it is about giving my all to whatever I pursue," she said, her voice steady as if she were reciting one of her own verses.
She talked about her own ikigai – a Japanese concept meaning purpose – and how it has evolved over time. From clearing the NET exam, to embracing motherhood, to finally stepping onto a stage as a performer, each phase was guided by a sense of purpose that kept shifting. "My biggest measure of success? Women across the world finding their story in mine," she said, and I could see the sincerity behind those words.
One anecdote that stayed with me was when Jasmine described sabbaticals as "not pauses in growth" but "the most powerful phases of reinvention". She compared them to a semicolon in a sentence – hardly an ending, more like a pause that gives the next part room to breathe. It made me rethink the way I see my own career break after my marriage; maybe it isn’t a setback but a chance to re‑calibrate.
When the conversation turned to confidence, Jasmine pointed out a deeper cultural conditioning. "Women are nurtured to be emotional anchors, but the moment they claim space, they are labelled difficult," she said. Her answer was to turn storytelling into a form of resistance, creating spaces where the unheard voices could finally be heard.
She also mentioned her debut in cinema at the age of fifty‑two, proving that ambition truly has no expiration date. I felt a sudden surge of optimism, thinking about how many of us hold back because we think we’re too old to start something new.
Collective growth over personal glory – Mariyam Khatri’s vision
Mariyam Khatri, Founder and Creative Director of Banana Labs, offered a slightly different flavour of success. While Priyanka focused on personal stability and Jasmine on purpose, Mariyam talked about shifting from individual milestones to collective growth. "When I started, success was personal – about building something of my own," she said, recalling the early days of her brand when she was the sole decision‑maker.
Today, however, she emphasized that success is about growing alongside the people who make the brand possible – artisans, seamstresses, and the countless hands that turn a sketch into a final product. For Mariyam, the progress of these individuals is as important as the brand’s own trajectory. She described this as redefining success as shared impact rather than a solitary trophy.
When asked about balance, Mariyam rejected the idea of a fixed destination. "It’s not something you arrive at," she explained. "It keeps changing depending on what matters most in that moment." This fluidity reminded me of my own daily schedule – some days I prioritize my work project, other days I focus on my mother’s health, and sometimes I just need to finish a novel I’ve been reading on the train.
Mariyam also spoke candidly about confidence. With a soft demeanour, she often felt her authority underestimated. "Softness can be mistaken for passivity," she said, but added, "There’s conviction underneath and when needed, I stand my ground." It struck a chord because I have often been told to be more "firm" in meetings, even when my ideas are solid.
Adaptability, for Mariyam, is not about compromising values. "I’m not adaptable when it means compromising what we stand for," she asserted. Her drive, she said, is fuelled by a mixture of impatience, the need to build, and a deep‑rooted resilience. I could see a pattern emerging among all three women – ambition tempered with a strong sense of self‑worth.
My takeaways – balancing ambition, confidence and reinvention
Listening to these three stories, I realised that the myth of "having it all" is just that – a myth. It’s not about fitting every role perfectly; it’s about acknowledging the pressure, then deciding which parts truly matter to you. Priyanka’s journey taught me that survival can evolve into self‑definition when you own the narrative. Jasmine reminded me that purpose can be fluid, and a break can be a catalyst rather than a setback. Mariyam showed that success blossoms when it lifts others along the way.
One common thread I noticed was the way each of them dealt with confidence. Priyanka’s confidence was often branded as "too bold", Jasmine’s as "difficult", and Mariyam’s as "soft". Yet each of them turned those labels into fuel. Priyanka stayed grounded, Jasmine turned storytelling into resistance, and Mariyam let her conviction speak louder than any stereotype.
Adaptability stood out as another theme, but not in the generic "be flexible" sense. For Priyanka, it was about transforming from a housewife to a hairstylist and learning to lead a team. For Jasmine, it meant reinventing herself from economist to poet to actress, even stepping onto a film set in her fifties. For Mariyam, adaptability meant scaling her brand without compromising core values.
All three also emphasized the importance of redefining ambition. Priyanka urged, "Never be afraid to take a bold step, even if no one supports you. You either win or you learn." Jasmine confessed she spent many years trying to be the "good girl" and only later learned to prioritize herself unapologetically. Mariyam added, "Ambition doesn’t have to be loud to be powerful. Meaningful work has its own rhythm." Their words felt like a gentle nudge for me to stop measuring success by external milestones and start checking in with my inner compass.
How these insights fit into everyday Indian life
Back home in a small town near Pune, I see women juggling tea stalls, school runs, and occasional freelance gigs. The pressure to "have it all" is palpable, especially when family gatherings turn into discussions about marriage, career, and property. The stories of Priyanka, Jasmine and Mariyam feel close to home because they echo the daily choices many of us make – whether it’s a single mother taking up a new skill to support her kids, or a middle‑aged woman deciding to go back to college after the kids are grown.
Take the example of my neighbour, Sunita, who started a tiny tailoring business after her husband lost his job. She tells me she never imagined owning a shop, but like Priyanka, she sees the small space she rents now as a symbol of resilience. Or my cousin Rajesh’s sister, who writes poetry on weekends – she often mentions Jasmine’s line about "a semicolon" when she explains why she took a six‑month break from teaching. These tiny, everyday moments reflect the larger narrative of redefining success.
Even the idea of collective growth, as Mariyam described, resonates with the co‑operatives that are sprouting in many villages. When a group of women in my aunt’s district decided to pool resources for a dairy farm, they spoke of shared impact exactly the way Banana Labs does with its artisans.
All these examples reinforce that success isn’t a one‑size‑fits‑all checklist. It’s a personal, evolving journey that can include owning a rooftop garden, writing a short story, or simply being able to pay school fees on time. The three women’s stories have given me a kind of roadmap – not a strict plan, but a reminder that the route can twist, turn, and still lead to a place that feels right.
Final thoughts – writing my own definition of success
As I wrap up my notes, I feel a sense of relief, as if a weight has been lifted. The old idea of success – a big house, a fancy title, a shiny car – still exists, but it no longer feels like the only path. Priyanka, Jasmine and Mariyam have shown that success can be about owning a home, about helping others find their voice, or about building a brand that lifts a community.
For me, the next step is simple: start small, stay true to my purpose, and give myself permission to reinvent whenever needed. I might not become a salon expert, a poet, or a brand founder, but I can apply the same principles – ownership, purpose, collective growth, confidence, and adaptability – to my own life. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll share my own story someday and add another voice to this growing chorus of women redefining what it means to succeed in India.
